Tomorrow morning early we will leave the ranch. 'Odd how quickly it can all change so much', observes Ant, 'how fast it can go wrong'. He means The Dream. That'll teach us, I think, to let our Hearts rule our Heads. When I first arrived, just four weeks ago, four weeks, I felt intimidated Here. [...]

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That we will be on the move again is inevitable. I rail against the thought of more unsettledness, more uncertainty, more bloody racketing around. But I rail more against our employers. (Can they be employers even when they don't' honour Employment contracts?). They have made the mistake so many Investors in Africa make - listen [...]

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I walk a wide, wide beach the colour of a perfect capuccino. The sea is cleaner now - last weekend a swathe of water like coffee stained the deepblue ; evidence of recent heavy, heavy rain so that the river to the north spat debris for weeks is everywhere: the roots of borassus palms; bits [...]

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  So we left.   And it was easier than I imagined. You bung all your stuff into a 40 ft container and you close the doors and you hand over the house keys and you get into the car with 2 dogs and a cat and you drive away and suddenly there's this glorious [...]

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I have been where I am now before. Not long ago. Twice. The smell of boxes is familiar and the sound of the hiss and strip of tape as those boxes are sealed is a noise that conjures recent memory. This is the third time in 13 months. Third time lucky. That's what I say. [...]

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  Tomorrow this move begins. In convoluted, extrapolated, adventurous and sometimes exhausting fashion. Navigating ourselves north and south and north again over thousands of miles, we'll sustain ourselves with flasks of tea and sticks of biltong. We'll carry the essentials of early day living with us: the dogs, my computer, a very old cat, enough [...]

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I keep trying to line up the words. If I line them all up, they'll make sense. I'll make sense. Life will make sense.  But life's full of circles and whirls and knots which is why I can't regiment my prose tidily. To go back and iron out all the change so that some order [...]

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I think with Change - lots and lots of change so that you haven't got time to evolve quick enough, keep up with it, morph, adapt, find your feet - there's a danger you'll lose sight of who you are and where you're going. I think there is a tendency to look at this enormously [...]

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Last night I dreamt that I was drowning. I woke unafraid, only amazed that I had remembered the murky green and seaweed hair that had swum through my unconscious visions; I rarely remember my dreams. I often wake in slurred haste and can't remember my name such is the leaden weight of comatose state I [...]

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In the past two weeks two friends have lost husbands. Suddenly and unexpectedly. The men long shy of their 3scoreandten, their wives much too young to morph, over night, as widows. I cannot feel their loss for, mercifully, it is not mine to feel. But I can empathize. My dad was 47 when he died. [...]

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